Tuesday, January 17, 2012

On Honey

Honey is flower nectar that is fanned and heated into a viscous substance. Its flavor ranges from sweet to sweet, with perfume of clover or perfume of peach, blueberry, apple, or various plants no one ever knew had flowers.

Honey might also have bee spit in it. I'm not a BEE-phile or BEE-ologist, so I'm not clear on that.

Honey should never be fed to infants under one year of age. The reason I've scraped up for this from a school called life says that honey can contain allergens (nectar=flower=pollen?) and that infants under one year of age aren't equipped to fighting those allergens.

Either that or something else. Don't take my word for it. I suppose if the warning's on every bottle of honey you buy it must be good advice, though, so don't give your 8 month old honey. (Did I mention freewriting doesn't have structure?)

When you usually buy honey, it's been separated from the comb. The wax, as it were, and the 'impurities.' It's been strained and drained and probably a couple other thousand things.

But I've also had honey with wax in it, and though I think it's ten times sweeter and has a slightly different taste (but in a good way). It's also a bit more viscous, and it crystallizes much faster (yup, honey crystallizes when it gets old, and it's hard to get out of the bottle, but VERY yummy). Crystallized honey makes honey put around it crystallize faster. It's an interesting phenomenon.

But a very little known fact is that in China, we saw solid honey. It might have wax in it, probably, but you can't tell. It's like rock candy. There are huge slabs of honey, which the guy chopped off with a knife into smaller slabs.

It is sweet. As I posted on facebook, it tastes like Sunshine. Candy. Heaven. Flowers. Happy Thoughts. (Read Peter Pan now, by the way. You will never think of kisses or thimbles the same way again.)

And it's probably not even that bad for you! I mean… it's not like you can inject sugar or chemicals into honey, unless probably you spray the flowers with chemicals… but it's China and I don't think they do that to flowers.

As Dad put it when his eyes were a normal size again… imagine thinking of honey as a liquid (however slowly it moves), for 44 years… and then showing up here, in some remote corner of the world, and finding out honey can be a block. And chopped. It's ridiculous. It's insane.

If I figure out how to make honey into a block in America… I'm doing it. My kids will have honey candy instead of Jolly Rangers and bubble gum.

We filmed the process of cutting a medium sized block of honey into small blocks of honey (a thin knife and a hammer on top of plastic on top of concrete), so hopefully we'll have that up somewhere soon!

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